Category Archives: Painting

Painting Eyeballs on Chaos

 

“My foot slips on a narrow ledge: in that split second, as needles of fear pierce my heart and temples, eternity intersects with present time.  Thought and action are not different, and stone, air, ice, sun, fear, and self are one.  What is exhilarating is to extend this acute awareness onto ordinary moments, in the moment-by-moment experiencing of the lammergeier and the wolf, which, finding themselves at the center of things, have no need for any secret of true being…To be anywhere else [but the present] is “to paint eyeballs on chaos.””( Dogen Zenji, Shobogenzo)  (249)

-Peter Matthiessen  The Snow Leopard 

 

It has been over a year since I read Peter Matthiessen’s The Snow Leopard. I have read and listened to many other books since then, but I think more images from his expedition to mountains of Nepal have stayed with me than from the rest of the stories combined. It is a very beautiful book. What he saw, how it affected him, and the words he used to share the experiences really resonated with me. If I was going to write a review of it I would have to keep returning to the thesaurus to find all the possible synonyms for breathtaking.

Journal sketch from 2016

If it had not been a borrowed book (Thanks, Jim) I would have underlined many passages, but towards the end the phrase “painting eyeballs on chaos” just reached out and grabbed me and I have been exploring it in my mind and in images ever since.  Any one who knows my art work knows that for years I have literally been painting eyeballs (and hand and birds) on and in chaos. Depending on the piece, the day and my mood there are many explanations of what all those chaotic swirls of color and pattern might signify. There is not even a consistency within my portfolio as to whether the writhing shapes are positive or negative, internal or external, but they are certainly pervasive. However since spending so much time thinking on this phrase and what it meant to Matthiessen I have wondered how much of what I am trying to express in my art work could be simplified down to the problem of not being in the present and needing to get there.

Sitting down to write this post reminded me that I never read  Dogen’s Shobogenzo that Matthiessen is quoting, so I have just ordered a copy.  I have read many Christian Mystics whose focus on mindfulness I believe is very close to the Buddhist idea of Zen, but it will be interesting to see if his writing matches what I expect (well, if I can understand a 13th century Zen master at all).  Recent correspondence and conversations on meaning with intriguing friends have my thoughts going in many different directions, but I feel like somehow they will all spiral back together to the importance of being present here and now.

Anyway, this post is not a book report, a dissection of the meaning behind my art, and certainly not a dissertation on philosophy or religion.  I really just wanted to share that as I continue to explore these ideas I am now not only painting and drawing eyeballs on chaos, but I am tattooing them on as well!

Chest Tattoo 12/1/18

Colored Pencil, March 2018

Acrylic on Board and Frame, April 2018

Mixed Media on Wood, July 2018

Finally Finished

 

“It took too long for her to realize that what she thought were whispers from deep within the stone were actually just the echoes of her own tangled desires.”

 

I am so glad to finally be finished with this painting. I have been working on it off and on since May, and honestly it feels even longer. I put the final touches on it this morning in time to take it to the Sautee Nachoochee Center for the next show. It will feel very good to start on something new.

 

Border Wall

Border Wall, Mixed Media on Wood Panel and Frame, March 2018

“It had not occurred to her that they would choose different sides.”

 

 

 

I worked on this piece from October 2017 to March 2018 and took more in progress photos than usual. I think it is fun to see how it developed.

Resisted

Resisted, Mixed Media on Wood,
10.75 x 10.75 “, 3/2018

If I have the gift of prophecy and can fathom all
mysteries and all knowledge, 
and if I have a faith
that can move mountains, but do not have love,
I am nothing.                                – Jeremiah 17:9

Flight Opportunity

Flight Opportunity, Acrylic on Canvas, October 2016Flight Opportunity, Acrylic on Canvas, 23″ x 31″, October 2016

 

 

 

 

I worked on this painting from April to October 2016. It has been shown at the Quinlan Art Center in Gainesville and the Sautee Nachoochee Art Center, but I just got it hung on the wall at my new house yesterday morning. It is now directly in front of me when I sit in the living room to drink my coffee in the morning to read and write. I have been spending a lot of time lately thinking about what the next step in my life should be, the reasons I might chose one path or another, and the validity of those reasons in the grand scheme of things.  The most recent work I have been doing has been trying to face the decisions and the emotions that come along with them head on. But somehow this painting brought me to realizations that the others had not.

The symbolism is not obscured. One does not need to be an expert in art interpretation or psychology to see that the figure in the picture is lost deep in the tangle of vegetation, smothered but still making an effort to reach out towards the clearing. Though the little bird may have an opportunity to take flight, at first glance it seems unlikely the hidden figure will. I think the case could be made that a sacrifice has been made to give the little bird a chance.  The fact that I know that underneath this painting is the last self portrait I attempted before moving to Mexico literally adds another layer of meaning. Even though the years of marriage and children have covered up who I once was, I like the new painting better than the old one. I do not wish to move backwards. If by chance someone should climb up out of the tangle I would not want it to be the same person who got covered up to start with.

 

 

 

Perennial Possibilities

Perennial Possibilities by Jennifer Herrera, Acrylic on Cutting Block

Perennial Possibilities, Acrylic on Cutting Block

 

 

First Sketch/Doodle

First Sketch/Doodle

My father, Noyes Capehart, has a page on his website called Thematic Variations where he states,

“It is one of the great lessons from the art of the past: the first response to a picture idea – the same could be said of a piece of music or a story – may not reveal its essence. One need only look at Monet’s impressive output of water lilies, or Morandi’s tireless efforts to capture the mystery of bottles, or Picasso’s insatiable curiosity with Manet’s Luncheon on the Grass to see that the first solution is not always the strongest. Beethoven fashioned no fewer than three variations of the overture to his Leonora, and Tolstoy was making changes with War and Peace as it went to press. I think of a variation in much the same way that I consider an artichoke; the outer, tough leaves have to be peeled away in order to reveal the delicious heart.”

Coloring Book Page The revisiting I have been doing of the image ‘Perennial Possibilities’  does not find itself in the same category as the master works that he mentions, but I still find it interesting to look at the different ways I have worked with the same blooming face and swirls over the past few months.

The image started as a work day doodle on the back of a report right as I was getting ready to start fColoring Book Coverocusing my attention on creating my Curled, Whirled and Twisted coloring book. The doodle actually ended up being the start for two separate coloring pages as well as the principal image I used for the cover.

Since the coloring book’s completion I have been refocusing on my painting. I have finished three small paintings this month, one of which is an acrylic on chopping block version of Perennial Possibilities. I thought I was done with the image until I started putting this post together. Now I am wondering if I should revisit it yet again and see what else might evolve.

Planning for the Moon

My coworkers are incredibly supportive when it comes to my artwork. I don’t think anyone finds it odd anymore that my brain does its best work trying to figure out the logic behind a report while my hands are doodling swirls and birds and such. A few especially nice folks have even left me little notes with doodles that made an impression on them which always makes me smile.

Most of my work doodles are the kind that happen when I am thinking about something else. They start with a little flower or a swirl and slowly grow through out the day or even the week. Some are better than others. I have plenty that are easily forgotten and also a few that turn into full size paintings or pages in a coloring book. But the other day I was not just doodling. I was sketching an idea for a painting for my sister’s birthday. I knew basically what I wanted to do, but I was not sure about the composition, so while waiting for data to refresh I was trying out different placement ideas. I then got up to get more coffee or something.Infinity Moon Sketch

I knew it was not the kind of drawing someone would stop to look at, so I had no idea why when I came back to my desk several people were gathered around looking at my notebook. They were also shaking their heads and talking amongst themselves. When I got closer they asked my if I was okay and if while I had been sick I had “lost it.” And by “it” they meant my artistic ability. I made an attempt to explain I was trying out a new idea, but they didn’t seem to be buying it. So this post is to show them the finished piece in hopes of redeeming my poor little sketch. I feel like it did its job even though it wasn’t a glamorous one.

This little painting (8×10″ on paper) is a bit different from what i normally do. My sister Rachel, who turns 35 today, has always loved and repeatedly used the phrase, “I love you to the moon and back,” so this is my rendition of it for her, cause I love her to the moon and back and back and back, to infinity if you will.

Rachel's Picture - Love you to the Moon and Back

Rachel’s Picture – Love you to the Moon and Back

 

Seasons Greetings!

I just barely finished the painting I used for my Christmas Card before we left for our holidays visits to NC. I had gotten so frustrated with it that I had considered starting over completely. That was a good thing because it allowed me to make dramatic changes without fear of ruining it. I had to use a company that offered overnight printing for pickup in my hometown so the color on the cards I managed to send out is not quite right, but it is close. Overall I am pleased with the image and the message.

Merry Christmas!

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Mixed Media on Paper